Families having to care for a loved one who is living with a terminal diagnosis for an extended period of time, are faced with many complex challenges. The initial diagnosis of a terminal illness creates a crisis within the family, and the most common reactions are anxiety and fear.
They will be dealing with setbacks and a decline in the person’s health, together with stages of remission and renewed hope. It may mean talking to their family member about dying and death. There may be evolving dynamics within the family, as each member deals differently with their grief. Sometimes this involves confronting family issues that may have been unspoken but unresolved for many years.
Family members who are exposed to a prolonged period of grieving for a terminally ill loved one, are susceptible to debilitating anxiety, depression and physical illness.
It is helpful at an early stage for family members to seek guidance on how to anticipate and deal with issues such as what to expect when they talk with their loved one, how they will cope with their own emotional reactions and how to access professional counselling.
After the initial shock of a terminal diagnosis, the family find there is much work to be done in scheduling doctor’s appointments, treatment times, accessing social services and entitlements, and ensuring important legal work such as a Health Directive, and/or various Powers of Attorney and a Will are completed.
How the family organizes itself to undertake these tasks can have a deep emotional effect on some members, depending on how comfortable they feel with the role they have been given.
As the terminally ill person’s health gradually deteriorates, the complexities of dealing with everyday life can wear individuals down and lead to emotions of guilt, anger and resentment. It becomes increasingly important for family members to communicate honestly with each other, as suppressing thoughts and feelings can cause strained relationships within the family.
The final stages of a person’s life bring mixed emotions to family members including both sadness and relief. Each person’s experiences during this time can either be helped or hindered by the dynamics between each other, the roles and responsibilities of each member, the extent to which the family members are close to one another, and the family’s emotional language and degree of communication.
